"We Are Groot!" Pitch Slam Team, REVEALED!

If you follow me on Twitter, you probably heard about Pitch Slam, headed by the amazing L. L. McKinney.

I know I say this a lot, but this time I mean it very honestly: I've never seen such a talented pool of entries. I was in shock, honestly! There weren't any I could throw out right away due to crazy lack of talent. I honestly think almost every single one would be able to get requests from agents, which made my job of picking only eight very hard but also oddly relaxing; I knew they'd find other ways to attaining their goals.

In the end, all mine came down to subjectivity. I loved these entries, their voices, prose, pitches... different things for different ones. 

If you didn't make it on any of the Pitch Slam teams, seriously, don't fret at ALL. There was so much talent, I bet I could randomly pick eight and find a solid team. Honestly, I was blown away (and hopefully some of you who didn't make it into Pitch Slam will submit to Nightmare on Query Street co-hosted by yours truly!).

Make sure to check out L.L. McKinney's team, Michelle's team, and Jamie's team.

SO. MY TEAM. HERE WE GO.

*DRUMS ROLL*

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WE HAVE:

THE BATTLE OF WONDERLAND GARDENS

THE PACKING HOUSE

THE SAYER

RESTRICTED ACCESS

A GOOD GIRL

MARANATHA ROAD

BUSY BODIES

NEVERLAND

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! I love this team :) Congrats if you got in, and congrats if you didn't, because you gave me one hell of a ride, seriously. (And if you are on another's team, it's probably because I didn't read many of the entries that someone called dibs on, and/or because I lost you in negotiation :( ) Before you do anything, read your own entry and make sure I didn't lose any italics while switching from email to blog post! Make sure I didn't make any mistake, and if I did, Tweeting at me would be the fastest way to reach me. Other options include commenting on this post or emailing me.

But this team is solid. It all ended up being based on my subjective preferences, which means I'm rooting for you guys no matter WHAT happens in the contest! Why?

Because we are awesome.

We are fantastic.

WE ARE GROOT

(Team name :D)

If anyone asks who are, WE ARE GROOT! Amazing, natural, Earthy, silent but deadly, and bigger than life (don't kill me, but I haven't watched Guardians yet (I know, I have to!) so I'm throwing adjectives out at you guys that I think will fit; I CAN STILL LOVE GROOT THOUGH D:).

Look how Groot is.

Seriously.

WE ARE GROOT!

Now go out and rock this contest!!!! Comments are set on moderation, but comment on this post and cheer/congratulate/discuss as much as you want!!! Seriously, if you didn't get in this contest, don't sweat it. There are so many more opportunities and you guys are talented, I'm not saying it just to say it. This is just an exciting form of querying.

A reminder to any wishing to bid the new squad additions well wishes: please do not comment on any of the posts unless you are an Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. or any other bureaus. All compliments and accolades are to be given on the #PitchSlam twitter feed. The Agents will have from now until 3:oo pm Eastern on October 14th, to make requests for the new heroes to join them in field duty using the following format:

Lone Hero - Query and first 10 pages
Dynamic Duo - Query and first 25 pages
The Trio - Query and first 50 pages
Team Takedown - Query and first 100 pages
ASSEMBLE - Query and full

When the request window closes, the Superhero Showdowns begin. Requests will not be revealed until the after the Showdowns are complete.

If more than one Agent makes the same request on a single entry, those agents go head-to-head in hero trivia. Each Agent in the showdown will be tagged in a #SuperheroShowdown tweet. The Agent who answers correctly first keeps their request as is. Their opponent can then choose to have their request demoted one level or wait 24 hours to receive their initial request. OR the Agent can call in for backup.

Agent Coulson from S.H.I.E.L.D. is standing by to lend assistance when needed. If contacted, he can come in and negate a loss, ending the showdown in a draw. If absolutely necessary, commander Nick Fury can issue a Showdown Override, upgrading an Agent's request to the next level if applicable, giving them victory. Agents can call on Coulson three times and Fury twice.

Again, to all who...

ERROR

Signal disruption detected. Security protocols engaged.

ERROR

Signal dis--

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All those receiving this transmission, know that your heroes cannot save you. S.H.I.E.L.D. is defenseless against our tactics. The H.E.L.M. Initiative is doomed. Though you have bolstered your ranks with the entries below, and across the four squad hubs, know that your efforts are futile. We rise, ready to face your warriors with our own. Come. FACE US, if you dare.

Cut off a head, and two more take it's place.

Hail Hydra.

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Transmission terminated.

Pitch Slam: A GOOD GIRL - NA Romance

Title: A Good Girl
Genre: New Adult Romance
Word Count: 78,000

Hero: Cat Stratford from 10 Things I Hate About You.

Pitch: Charlie's done her last walk of shame. Escaping to college she reinvents herself as good girl Charlotte, but being good is hard. Faced with temptation it's either risk her heart or save her new reputation.

250: 

The bass vibrates through me as I lean against the wall and try, without success, to stop the room from spinning. Out the corner of my eye I catch the curl of Lisa Myer's lip as she sneers in my direction, before turning to her friend. "She's the one I was telling you about." Her voice travels over the noise, and I glare back. God, don't they ever get fed up talking about me?

Because of my reputation they think they can say what they like. Bitches. At least after tonight I won't have to deal with them anymore. I'm leaving in the morning and sure, getting trashed at some party the night before isn't the smartest idea but there was no way I was going to stay home, alone... again.

Ignoring them, I throw back another shot and wait as the tequila starts to do its job. I've almost had enough alcohol to convince myself I'm having a good time. Almost but not enough. So when the hot guy that's been watching me all night hands me a beer, I accept it and flash him an overly bright smile. Taking it as the sign of encouragement I intended, he moves closer. Hmm, he is very good looking. Tall, broad shoulders with dark jeans that hand low on his tapered waist.

"Hey." The guy's arm wraps round my waist, and I gulp. I promised myself I wouldn't. Not tonight. But when he looks at me through hooded eyes, I'm gone.

Pitch Slam: MARANATHA ROAD - Adult Literary

Title: MARANATHA ROAD
Word Count: 82,000

Genre: Adult Literary

Hero: Sadie Caswell doesn't believe in heroes or heroines, but if she had to pick one, she'd say Jackie Kennedy because—even though she isn't from the South—you can tell that girl was raised right.

Pitch: After Sadie’s son died, she spurned Tinley, who was pregnant with his baby. When Sadie’s husband gets sick, she must hurry to make amends before he runs out of time to meet their grandchild.

250:

Chapter One: Tinley

If Mr. Stepp's white car comes crawling down the driveway, it'll mean they haven't found Mama and Daddy. It's dark in the old chicken shed and nobody knows where I am. When I bend down, I can see through a hole in the wood—the fig tree, the gravel driveway, the road with fields on both sides, green and slippery in the rain.

If I see Daddy's light blue truck, it's easy. They got lost or the road was washed out. Mama will shake her head and say, "I'm awful sorry that everybody was worried." They were supposed to be back for supper yesterday, and now it's almost suppertime a day later but nobody's seen them.

If no cars come down the driveway, then they're still looking—Mr. Haughtry, the man Daddy works for and who lets us stay in a trailer on his land, and Mr. Stepp, who's Mrs. Haughtry's brother. Maybe they'll keep looking after it gets dark, even though it's Sunday and they'd usually head back to church for evening service, everybody but Mr. Haughtry who says he wouldn't darken the church doorstep if somebody paid him.

Earlier, Mrs. Haughtry said I could wait up at the house with her. "But I guess you're sixteen and you can go where you please." She sighed.

The shed smells like corn or seeds, something the chickens used to eat. Who knows what might be watching me in the dark—mice scratching in the dust or bats hanging from the wooden beams.

Pitch Slam: THE BATTLE OF WONDERLAND GARDENS - MG Fantasy Adventure

Title: The Battle of Wonderland Gardens
Genre: Middle Grade Fantasy Adventure
Word Count: 41,000

Hero: The protagonist, Ellis Brown, best relates to Captain America because he is reluctantly recruited to participate in an adventure where he leads a group of unlikely team members toward a common goal. Captain America has superhuman physical skills and Ellis has above average physical skills. Captain America is susceptible to normal human vulnerabilities, while Ellis’s weaknesses are always being second best and bad dancing. These two would get along very well.

Pitch: After his middle school nemesis is kidnapped at a retirement home by its possessed dance instructor, Ellis must save the girl and lead the oddball elderly residents to battle the demon and its raven minions.

250:

Ellis Brown could not believe what he just heard. The air seeped from his balloon of hope and instantly ruined his once-promising Saturday morning. “You mean a girl has already been here selling these tickets?”

Mr. and Mrs. McGregor, the Wonderland Gardens Retirement Center’s hosts, sat in the lobby’s red velvet arm chairs smiling. Mr. McGregor returned the tickets that Ellis just tried to sell them and said, “Yes, she came about an hour ago. Still in the building, I believe.”

Mrs. McGregor beamed. “Such an angel, blonde hair, blue eyes, and beaming with joy.”

Yep, that’s Alicia. What a fake. Ellis forced a smile as the anxiety bubbled in the pit of his stomach. “And I suppose she sold you tickets to our show?”

“As a matter of fact, she did," Mr. McGregor said. “Such a sweet young lady. She did mention that a friend of hers, a boy, may be stopping by later, and here you are.”

Sweet? Maybe, if rattlesnake’s venom is sweet. “She does have a way,” Ellis said.

Ellis was good kid, but he had one big problem, Alicia Swanson. She’d been a thorn in his side all throughout middle school. She beat him at everything and, to make matters worse, she had a habit of broadcasting it to everyone.

Ellis planned to beat Alicia by selling more Alice in Wonderland show tickets than her and was banking on the retirement home’s residents. Not any more. He felt the satisfaction of his victory slip painfully through his fingers.

Pitch Slam: THE PACKING HOUSE - YA Contemporary

Title: The Packing House

Genre: YA Contemporary
Word Count: 81,000

Hero: Iron Man. Joel tries to avoid his past until it becomes public knowledge. Forced to face his problems, Joel discovers his own super powers in the vulnerability of words, risking everything in a public poetry performance; in the same way, Iron Man faces his own wreck of a life, turned around for all the world to scrutinize, to become the badass hero of iron built upon his heart wound that would otherwise kill him.

Pitch: Everyone knows Joel's secret. It's all over YouTube. Joel must track down and face the unknown person behind his nightmares, and find a way to publicly regain his dignity through participating in a poetry slam.

250:

At the bell, I head to study hall, my last class. There's a substitute today. Cell phones come out. Someone has their iPod up way too high. In a way I feel sorry for the sub; has to be right up there with garbage collector. I prop a book between myself and my backpack, then close my eyes, which have slammed shut all day.

The next thing I know, the substitute is standing over me, his hand on my shoulder, shaking me awake. Someone sniggers nearby.

"Wake up, young man. There's no sleeping in study hall."

I look up and try to get my eyes to adjust and stay open, blink a few times, and look around wildly. What an idiot. I even forgot where I was for a moment. A surge of warmth starts at my ears and neck before it slides across my cheeks.

"All right, I'm up."

Whispers erupt in various places around me, as I sit up and rub my eyes. Someone laughs. My desk is askew. Something smells bad. Sulfur. Odd…the realization hits me hard.

A female voice remarks, "If I were him, I'd be totally embarrassed!"

"What's your name?" the substitute asks quietly.

"Joel Scrivener."

The substitute leans down. "Joel? You might want to speak with a counselor about those dreams."

"What do you mean?"

He leans closer, lowers his voice. "You kept saying, 'get off me, stop touching me, get off me,' over and over."

He gives me what he must think is a reassuring smile. Then he leaves.

Pitch Slam: THE SAYER - YA Sci-Fi Space Opera

Title: The Sayer

Genre: YA Sci-Fi Space Opera
Word Count: 85,000

Hero: Robin Hood, he steals from the rich and gives to the poor. (featured in Marvel comic Earth-616)

Pitch: Theo wants revenge for the public executions of his parents. After using an asteroid to destroy the Martian President’s car, he starts an intergalactic war and discovers his parents created him from alien DNA.

250:

If I screw up, I kill these people. Theo breathed. This could go so wrong. He breathed again. Self-doubt crushed under the weight of determination. A dry brittle egg of weakness, shattered. Fueled by murder, injustice, fiery grief. His blood chanted in his veins, whispering his name to him above the clamor of the Martian crowds. His name, fractured in hypnotic beats. 

Say-er. Say-er. Sayer.

The Martian people amassed in a screaming, dancing mob filled the park, copper red buildings cutting into the red sky on every side. A woman brushed against him. Her skin touching his bare arm banished the chill in the air, startling him. She didn’t notice him. He recognized in an instant everything about her: grey hairs tucked behind her ears, small wrinkles of her jowl, tiny signs of aging. Her open-mouthed laugh slapped at his memory. Her expression repeated on every face in the crowd. They were not the same people who’d attended his parent’s executions, people he’d seen from the stage. The horde of martian spectators gathered, same as any celebration day, any reason to binge party. Any reason. Even a public execution. The chance to see his parent’s heads roll. His nightmare, the President’s victory, the people’s entertainment. 

Theo’s hand tightened around his phone. 

A small, basketball-sized asteroid was his remote controlled missile, traveling at a speed of twenty thousand miles an hour with two tiny thrusters. If he didn’t hit the safe zone, he stood on ground zero.

Pitch Slam: RESTRICTED ACCESS - YA Dystopia

Title: Restricted Access
Genre: YA Dystopia
Word Count: 91,000

Hero: Amber relates best to Black Widow for her grace, style, and all-around asskickeryness.

Pitch: In a future where memories can be watched like YouTube videos, seventeen-year-old computer geek, Amber Ross, must catch a killer before the only boy she’s ever loved is executed in his place.

250:

Damon’s cornflower eyes hold me captive as I march down the aisle toward him. It’s our ninth time making vows, but his ancient tuxedo with cuff links, bow tie, and tails still sends my heart tumbling.

With the veil over my face, I focus on not tripping. The last thing I want is a thousand VizCam files popping up on the nets tonight, all showing me face-planting in white satin.

I manage not to fall, and take my place beside him, loving how my four-inch heels put us at eye level. His chocolate-colored hair is slicked back, and right now, with our eyes locked, it's easy to pretend he likes me back.

The priest makes a speech and angles toward me. "Jane Smith, do you take John Jones to be your lawfully wedded husband…." The words enchant me, like romantic whispers carried on a timeless breeze to an undeserving present. "…for as long as you both shall live?"

The answer comes unbidden. "I do."

He nods and faces Damon. Somewhere between "to have and to hold" and discovering a tiny scar in Damon's left eyebrow, I decide today's the day I'll tell him my real name, even if it kills me.

The priest finishes, but Damon just stares into space, his face an expressionless puzzle. I stifle the urge to improvise.

The priest clears his throat.

Finally, Damon blinks and shakes his head. "I do."

"Then I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."

Each time I hear these words… breathe.

Pitch Slam: BUSY BODIES - Adult Comic Crime Fiction

Title: Busy Bodies
Genre: Adult - Comic Crime Fiction
Word Count: 97,000

Hero: Johnny Campbell sees himself as a noir hero à la Sam Spade: Canny, street-smart and able to deal with any situation. He’s wrong on all counts.

Pitch: Would-be insurance swindler Johnny Campbell has just faked his death using a clone of himself—and incidentally gotten his hapless wife Darcy arrested for his murder. There’s only one solution: He has to die. Again.

250:

The powder-blue Volvo turned into the driveway. Weeds growing through cracks in the concrete brushed against the undercarriage as the car coasted smoothly into the carport and stopped. If any neighbors were watching, they’d just seen Gerhard Neiman’s car turn into Gerhard Neiman’s driveway; nothing suspicious. But the man behind the wheel wasn’t Gerhard Neiman, and it would really be better if no one spotted him, as he’d come here to rob the place.

He had a cover story ready, of course. If a neighbor actually came over and said hello, he was Johnny Campbell, a mechanic who’d fixed Neiman’s car and was now returning it. The story had the advantage of being mostly true, though it did contain a few holes. For one thing, Neiman wasn’t home, or at least Johnny sincerely hoped he wasn’t. For another, if Johnny was dropping off this car, how did he plan to get home himself? But surely Neiman’s neighbors weren’t in the habit of bounding over to say hello whenever he drove up. He was too menacing a figure for that.

Johnny slipped quietly out of the Volvo and made his way down a rutted dirt path running alongside the house. The white clapboard siding was interrupted here by a few tall windows, all of them screened and grimy and hard to see much through. The gate to a white picket fence enclosing the backyard lay on the grass beside the open gateway, its pickets swollen with moisture. Great, Johnny thought, I’m robbing a complete dump.

Pitch Slam: NEVERLAND - Adult Epic Fantasy

Title: Neverland
Genre: Adult Epic Fantasy
Word Count: 105,000

Hero: Peeta from The Hunger Games, because they both love someone who doesn't always give them the same in return.

(NEVERLAND is a reimagining of the story of Peter Pan and James Hook, with the initial twist being that James is now Jaime, a girl.)

Pitch: When Peter Pan murders the dictator Emperor of Neverland, the island of immortals bursts into civil war, forcing Jaime to decide to either take her father’s throne or follow Peter, the man she loves.

First 250:

“Don’t kill him,” Blackbeard whispered to himself. “Just don’t kill him.”

As the carriage trundled on through the streets of the dockyards, frustration began to dance across his face. After three hundred and fifty-seven years, he knew himself too well. “Fuck it, I think I’m gonna kill him.”

He reached down and unsheathed the knife that was strapped to his leg, then opened the carriage door and flung it out into the street. But that did little to ease his mind, for he knew he was most certainly heading into a trap.

The palace courtyard was filled with arriving guests, and for a moment, Blackbeard hoped he might go unnoticed. But as he stepped into the ballroom, he was inundated with a multitude of stares and gasps. The lords, ladies, and courtiers were not accustomed to seeing a pirate, and although he had cleaned himself up, the trappings of his face painted true his identity. His solitary eye settled on the nearest bar, and he slowly made his way over. He leaned against the counter while a servant poured him a glass of wine.

“I’m afraid they don’t have any rum,” said a voice behind him.

Blackbeard froze in place. He cursed himself for discarding the knife. “Then they must not have been expecting any real men,” he said, then turning to face the speaker, he added, “only cunts.”

David Hameth simply smiled. “Ah, the tongue of the sea. Long has it been since it last graced these halls.”

Blackbeard raised an eyebrow, enhancing the weathered crevices on his forehead. “That it has.” He set down his glass and rose to face Hameth. “I’m surprised they still stand without me.”